Alaska Native survives -- and thrives

Fancher says as long as she can remember she was physically and sexually abused. She says she believes her abuse began at age 4. It came at the hands of family members, friends of family, even a boyfriend. As she explained to listeners on my radio show Monday, as long as she can remember, the idea of people doing to her physically, what they wanted to, was just a normal part of life.

At the time, Fancher didn't say anything about later incidents because she had learned a lesson early on: Speak out on her abuse in her village, she would be the one who would be shunned. Fancher says every time she would speak out on her sexual abuse to a family member, she was called a liar, and made to feel like a traitor.

Fancher says she was not alone in her misery. She says three of her five best friends growing up also were sexually abused in Unalakleet.

Fancher's lifetime of abuse led her to a point of total hopelessness. She says she stopped feeling and became numb. It was the only way to suppress the emotional pain deeply rooted inside her. But suppressing her feelings only led to more hopelessness.

One day Fancher decided life was no longer worth living. And like so many other teenagers in Bush Alaska, she loaded a gun and was ready to kill herself. But just seconds before pulling the trigger, she says God sent someone to stop her. Fancher says this was one of many times God would intervene in her life on her road to healing.

Fancher says another key moment in her life is when she found out about Alaska Christian College on the Kenai Peninsula.

ACC is a faith-based school that caters to Alaska Native kids living in the Bush. Ninety five percent of students at the accredited university are Native. The president, Dr. Keith Hamilton, says one year they conducted an anonymous survey of female students. Nine out of 10 said they had been either physically or sexually abused. When Rae Fancher decided to attend ACC herself, she had clearly come to the right place.

Fancher says she resisted help at first, not willing to open up to what she called God's love and healing. But she says ACC staff was persistent and eventually got through to her. They showed her that her abuse was not her fault. Fancher lived her whole life believing she was to blame for her abuse.

Fancher says she next learned the importance of forgiving her abusers. She says she gave her bitterness up to God. She realized her pain hurt her more than she could explain. She says when you hold onto your pain, anger and resentment deep inside, it eats at you, it decays your insides. Fancher says the key to her healing came when she realized she did not have the power on her own to forgive. Her ability to forgive her abusers came from God. She says it was supernatural. A miracle.

When you meet Naval Academy student Rae Fancher today, there is no sign she has lived a lifetime of horrible abuse. These days, unlike her torturous childhood, she's always smiling, is well balanced, confident and full of joy.

Rae Fancher, the first Alaska Native female ever to make it into the prestigious Naval Academy, is for all practical purposes a walking miracle.

Dan Fagan hosts a talk show on AM-750 KFQD and publishes the Web site thealaskastandard.com.