Alaska Ear

Ear caught up with him after he'd been pummeled by the witches on "The View," grilled by Sean Hannity, who hadn't read the book, and tolerated by Joy Behar after he told her, "I'm a conservative, a Christian and pro-life." Frank seemed mostly bemused by the whole experience.

"Walking off the set of 'The View,' feeling a bit like a ping-pong ball in a tennis match," he told Ear, "I stepped into the green room, where a tall, beautiful black woman reached out her hand and said, 'Good job out there.' It was Queen Latifah. Her bodyguard, a man as big as a piano, shook my hand and did the fist bump, saying, 'Good job, man.' "

Hannity, on the other hand, was ticked, according to Frank. He accused Frank of attacking him in the book before the camera rolled, then delivered "a heated and ugly rant" on the air.

You'll have to check all this out for yourselves, darlings. Ear tried to watch "The View," but everyone (except Bailey) started screeching at the same time and Ear had to hit the Esc button. As for Hannity, Ear didn't even try.

NO COMMENT ... Joe McGinniss, the author who leaked an unfinished manuscript of the Bailey book in what looked to Ear like a sleazy effort to kill sales, is asking the public to help him write the last chapter of his anti-Sarah screed "The Rogue," due out later this year.

"Let's put it this way," says a blog item that purports to be from him: "imagine yourself in a dialogue with a friend who respected your opinions. You have three or four minutes, without interruption, to explain why Sarah Palin is every bit as bad as you believe her to be, and why she continues to be a danger to the USA."

Nothing's off limits, the offer says. Including Trig.

There's $250 for whoever "gives me the best suggestion" before the end of the month. Don't take Ear's word for it. Check it out yourself at www.joemcginniss.net/rogue-blog (entry dated May 17).

A QUESTION ... Speaking of She Who Was Governor, and everyone seems to be, has Sarah bought a home in Arizona, like daughter Bristol? The pundits on NPR Wednesday had a coast-to-coast guessathon about this and whether she's after the other Arizona Senate seat (not McCain's), or a more central spot to launch a presidential bid. How hard can it be for an Arizona news organization to find a factual answer to the house question? Alors!

OINK, OINK ... The Alaska Libertarian Party plans to protest a "grants symposium" set for 11 a.m. Wednesday at the Dena'ina with the congressional delegation -- Lisa, Mark and Don. Ear can't help but admire their age-of-killer-debt slogan: "Federal Grants are Made in China."

However, they're billing the event as a "Pork-fest Protest." Pardonnez Ear, but isn't "Porkfest" trademarked by Don's annual pig roast fundraiser?

DO SEND A FONDUE ... to Anchorage Press editor Brendan Kelley and Megan Hellenthal, scheduled to marry Saturday. And while you're at it, toss in a second fondue for writer Susy Buchanan, who will marry Rafael Sandoval at the same time. It's billed as a double ceremony at Patrick Flynn's home and, given the cast of characters, is likely to be the most fun wedding of the season.

Standup comic Matt Collins will officiate the Kelley-Hellenthal vows; Kelley will officiate the Buchanan-Sandoval vows. (Can this be legal?) Reception at the Crossroads Lounge. Since you're reading this on Sunday, the party is probably over. But then again, maybe not.

The brides are stepsisters. Megan is pollster Marc Hellenthal's daughter and a statistician in her own right. Susy is the daughter of Dr. Richard Buchanan and Jean (formerly Buchanan) Hellenthal. Susy, former Anchorage Press managing editor, has been running an English-language paper in Mexico but is back in town writing for the Press.

MISSED IT AGAIN ... The Rapture, that is. But here's a comment from an earwig that Ear can endorse: "If Saturday was truly The Rapture and all of us are unqualified for heaven yet, then congratulations to Walter Soboleff for being the only one worthy among us all."

NEW BLOOD ... Jim Hill, formerly of the local FOX affiliate, and Gregory Wilcheck, from the ABC/KYUR group, have bought interests in local television station KYES-Channel 5, joining longtime owners Carol Schatz and Jeremy Lansman. Schatz left active management at the station months ago to run KNBA, a public radio station, so the three guys will be managing the TV operation. In fact, the press release bills one of them as "The Working Man's Friend." Does that mean lots of wrestling, car repairs and naked women? Ear can only hope.

CROSSROADS OF THE WORLD ... Talk about the new international flavor of Anchorage: More than 50 foreign ambassadors are expected to visit Alaska in late June, part of a program called Experience America, sponsored by the federal Office of the Chief of Protocol. The goal is to show off America's good stuff and foster "international good will." Sounds like they'll have to press flesh with "government officials, business and community leaders," but maybe a visit to Resurrection Bay and the Arctic Ocean will actually expose them to some of the good stuff.

Compiled by Sheila Toomey. Message Sheila at 257-4341 or ear@adn.com. Find Ear online at www.adn.com/ear.