Healthy tanning fanatic worries this boyfriend

I've got the healthiest girlfriend in the world. She eats right, exercises, sleeps well, communicates and is a rock emotionally. The one area she is unhealthy, in my opinion -- and I know you guys hate these "just one thing" letters! -- is that she spends a lot of time in tanning booths.

In the winter, she probably tans twice a week at the gym or a salon. She probably tans every other week in the summer or whenever we have rainy weather. She loves tanning and says it's an important to her happiness. She says she feels more confident about her complexion and that the dose of light lifts her mood. I'm all for her happiness and doing what you have to do to survive our long winters, but I worry about her long-term health.

I want to marry her and have kids with her someday, but will she have skin cancer later in life? I'm even worried about how she'll feel if she starts wrinkling at 35 because of all the fake sun. I want her to be happy -- I love her because she's so happy. So do you think this is a topic I should press or leave alone?

-- It's Never Sunny in Anchorage

Wanda says,

I was reading an article this week -- yes, Wanda, reading! -- and some brainiacs claim that people who tan often are actually having their brain fried during those fake-and-bake sessions. Well, not technically fried -- in science speak, researchers found that the UV rays fire up parts of the brain that also respond when a person eats sugary sweets or takes drugs, the same parts of the brain that are engaged during addiction.

This is why, scientists surmise, people continue tanning even when they know all of the risks involved.

Then again, the rocket scientists on "Jersey Shore" tan multiple times weekly and they've proven that those killer tans -- supplemented by heavy doses of hair product, alcohol and terrible tattoos and coupled with complete lack of shame -- lead to lots of sex with multiple partners.

Who do you trust when competing reports like this arise? I typically vote in the favor of more sex, but I also typically vote against anything that reality television stars are in favor of. All of that being said, I'll go away from the scientists and juice heads for guidance and instead go with an old adage: Happy (future) wife, happy life.

If she wants to get her tan on, let her tan. There are worse addictions, like crack or alcohol or "Jersey Shore." If you continue to express your love, concern and reinforcement that she's beautiful no matter what she does, as well as even pass along the occasional anti-tanning research. It sounds like she's smart enough and health-conscious enough to possibly listen and make a change before the wrinkles or worse kick in. If not, at least she's happy.

Wayne says,

As a red-headed freckle-face, I shouldn't tan. (Not that I could if I wanted to. I go from pasty while to lobster red in about 12 minutes under the sun.) I've already had a weird mole or two removed and I've always approached the melanoma issue as a matter of when, not if. I should never, ever, ever set foot near a tanning bed. My dermatologist would read me the riot act.

But in Alaska? Yeah, I'd do it. And I have, reasoning that whatever my dermatologist recommended was canceled out by my therapist's advice. Alaskans need more sunlight, and we combat that deficiency the best we can.

It's sweet that the "one thing" about your otherwise awesome gal comes from a genuine concern about her health. Tanning twice a week is probably excessive and unhealthy, and you may be able to talk her into cutting back. Get her a light box for Christmas, spend time together outdoors during daylight, plant a giant bottle of Vitamin D on the kitchen countertop -- whatever it takes to elevate her mood without compromising her health.

And assure her she's beautiful no matter what shade her skin is. If she still insists on being a bronzed goddess year-round, buy her some good self-tanning lotion.

Hopefully she'll see how your concern comes from the right place, and make some adjustments so you don't have to worry as much.

If not, rest assured that first wrinkle will come long before 35 -- and its appearance on the scene will do far more to curb her tanning habit than any concerned boyfriend ever could.

• Wanda is a wise person who has loved, lost and been to therapy. Wayne is a wise guy who has no use for therapy. Send them your questions and thoughts at wanda@adn.com.