Wings 'n Things

By NICOLE TSONG
Anchorage Daily News

Published: August 23rd, 2005 10:01 PM
Last Modified: December 16th, 2007 06:59 AM

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The challenge is in the name: nuclear wings. Just the idea of a "nuke" from Wings 'n Things is intimidating, even for someone who doesn't mind ordering food extra-spicy, even though in some restaurants I have paid for it with a scorched tongue or a tummy ache.

Joe Connelly has been mixing the mysterious spices at Wings 'n Things since it opened in 1983. Don't ask for his recipe. He won't tell anybody. Just what's in a "nuclear" vs. a mild or hot wing? We can only guess.

Wings 'n Things serves what it calls "the original Anchorage wing." They're not served Buffalo-style, covered with a hot sauce. They are deep-fried, then shaken in Connelly's special spice mix with choices of mild, medium, hot, nuke or barbecue. Wings are logically the cafe's most popular items, with customers devoted to each level of spice and flavor, but the "things" on the menu include submarine sandwiches and a homemade chocolate brownie.

Even though I love spicy food, I didn't think I was ready for a nuke. But then I visited the restaurant on I Street downtown, ate some hot wings, which are one level of heat below the nukes and left feeling vaguely disappointed and without the warm, burning sensation that heat lovers lust after.

So I decided to brave the nukes, albeit cautiously. I experimented with a takeout order and took the special, which includes a 6-inch sub with just five wings for $7.95 or $8.95, depending on the sandwich variety. I hoped the teriyaki chicken sandwich would work as a chaser, a way to cool down the whole affair just in case.

When I opened the plastic foam container, the wings didn't look hotter than anything I had confronted before; the red oil pooling beneath them didn't send me running for my sandwich.

My first nuke wing was almost a pleasant experience, especially if you love to feel a slight burning sensation on your tongue that still lets you taste your food. The mix of spices that likely includes liberal amounts of cayenne pepper was evident, with heady cuminlike flavor instead of the typical hot sauce found on Buffalo wings. The chicken was tender. It tasted good, and I thought I could handle five, no problem.

My mouth started to feel a serious burn during the second wing. My tongue and lips were extra warm where the spices landed, and I dipped that wing just a little more in the cooling blue cheese dressing. I still thought I would be fine.

By the third wing, my mouth needed a break, and I dunked a stick of celery into blue cheese that seemed to be losing its effectiveness. I took a bite of the succulent teriyaki chicken as a breather.

It was only a temporary fix. The fourth wing created a five-alarm fire in my mouth. There was no cooling things down with blue cheese. I needed a beer.

I stared down the last nuke. I was afraid. My lips radiated heat, and I longed for relief not available in my kitchen. But I couldn't give up. I decided to drench the fifth wing in blue cheese then chow down fast in the hope that I wouldn't feel the heat so much.

It worked. Sort of.

I wouldn't recommend the nuke experiment to everyone. My mouth took several minutes to recover. And while I love spicy food, I also like to taste it, and by the last wing, I ate it just to get it over with, not because I could still taste the meat and flavorings. I'd say that except for the bravest of souls, nukes should be eaten in limited quantities if you still want your taste buds to work.

The other food at Wings 'n Things doesn't require as much courage. The teriyaki chicken sandwich, when I could taste it, was delicious, with big chunks of warm grilled chicken tucked between toasted roll halves and topped with a teriyaki sauce that was mildly sweet and not goopy or overdone.

The Philly cheese steak ($5.55 for a 6-inch) is touted as one of the most popular items on the menu. I tried one a few days before the nuke experiment. It is served with your choice of lettuce, tomatoes, provolone, mayonnaise, mustard, onions and oil atop a soft, toasted roll that held together well. But I found the sandwich bland, despite the melted provolone cheese and generous pile of grilled onions, and even mustard. The thinly sliced meat wasn't interesting, and the other extras provided the flavor. The combo sandwich ($4.75 for a 6-inch) was tastier, with a good balance of the three cold cuts and vegetables generously piled on top.

Wings are served in portions of 10 to 50 pieces that range in price from $6.95 to $27.95. The hot wings have a wonderful flavor and a spice burn that creeps up on you after you think it's over. But for those who adore spicy food, hot might not be hot enough. For those who abhor spicy food, consider the barbecue wings. They are covered in a homemade sauce that is lightly tangy and not too sweet. The wings were crisp underneath the sauce but richer than the regular wings and messier. All the wings come with crisp celery in plastic snack bags and containers of blue cheese dressing.

Maybe everyone won't take the approach I did at Wings 'n Things. But I know there are plenty of Anchorageites who are loyal customers. The lunchtime din at Wings 'n Things is terrific. Customers are blasted by the smell of sizzling meat and wings the moment they walk in the door. In the dining room, servers wander around with plates of wings and subs, calling out names, as other customers hover, waiting for tables to open up.

Eating at Wings 'n Things requires a little strategy. The lunch rush can be overwhelming, and getting there before noon is one way to guarantee you can sit down after you order at the crowded counter. You also can order takeout, but that doesn't guarantee speed -- a friend and I overheard a wait of an hour and 15 minutes for takeout during our weekday lunch visit.

I'm not sure if I will relive my nuke experience. I might turn into a heat wimp and return to "hot" next time I eat at Wings 'n Things and nab a nuke from braver friends. But the cafe serves up a highly desirable mini drumstick. The other "things" are pretty good but tend to take up room where wings could go.

WINGS 'N THINGS CAFE is at 529 I St. Hours: 9 a.m.-3 p.m. Monday-Wednesday and 9 a.m.-10 p.m. Thursday-Saturday. Closed Sunday. Call 277-9464.

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