Moving toward independence

Mariah Godes, left, strikes a pose after checking out an outfit she would wear to a dance at Service High School. Her mother, Beth Edmands, hangs it back up at right. Mariah has Down syndrome and would like a cell phone to start her on the way to an independent lifestyle.

Service High School senior Mariah Godes is not handicapped. That much she makes clear. "I don't like that word ..." she says, "because I'm not handicapped."

Godes has Down syndrome. But that's far from the most interesting topic she could think of to discuss.

The outgoing 19-year-old would rather talk about the milestones that lie ahead: graduating high school, getting a job, getting her own apartment. With such exciting possibilities in her future, why would anyone want to talk about anything else?

"She has those same dreams and desires that anybody her own age does," explains her mother, Beth Edmands. "She just thinks she can do anything."

Mariah didn't just compete in Special Olympics sports, she tried out for the Service High cheerleading team. When Mariah went to her first dance, Edmands worried her daughter might be disappointed. But Mariah ended the night in smiles, having danced with just about every young man in the room, including the prom king.

Edmands would like to see her daughter reach her goals -- especially the one that's most important to her right now: leaving home and living on her own. Her mother worries about the obstacles she will have to overcome.

Down syndrome, a genetic condition associated with mental retardation and multiple health problems, means Mariah will have to work harder than most of her classmates to do the things they take for granted.

There's no doubt that Mariah is enthusiastic and motivated. "But sometimes," Edmands says, "you wonder, 'Is this going to happen?' "

Mariah insists it will.

Though worried and protective, Edmands is not about to discourage her daughter. She's helped Mariah get on a waiting list for supportive services that will someday allow her to move into her own apartment. And she's encouraging her to learn the skills she'll need to live on her own, like cooking, doing laundry and paying bills.

Recently, Mariah interviewed for a job at a fast-food restaurant. To get to work once she leaves home, she'll need to master another skill she's been practicing: getting around town on the bus. Mariah is still learning. So far, she has ridden the bus only with others, never alone. That's where a cell phone would come in handy.

Mariah got the idea for the cell phone from a friend, 21, also with Down sydrome, who used his phone to call for help when he got lost on a bus. She's been talking about the phone for the last year, said her mother. Obviously, to Mariah, the cell phone means independence.

A cell phone doesn't exactly fit their budget, Edmands said -- unexpected medical costs can arise at any time -- but she can see the benefit of it.

"She really, super-duper, wants a job. And she would like to have a cell phone because she would like to feel safe when she is just learning how to ride the bus," Edmands said. "For somebody like her, that can be a safety issue."

It might also help Edmands breathe a little easier. Helping her daughter toward independence, she says, has been emotionally "much harder than I thought it would be."

Maybe with a cell phone, her daughter will have a little more of a safety net as she tests her wings. n

Mariah Godes

A-1 Nokia model 5120 digital phone, $99

A-2 Basic service for 12 months (220 minutes/month), $300

A-3 Related fees and taxes, $61