If you are numbed by the blah-blah-blah of today's cookie-cutter politics, listening to Donald Trump is like sticking your finger into a light socket.
The guy is grim death for stodgy politics, a one-man carnival, a heart attack for Republicans and Democrats alike. Only a few weeks ago, The Donald was content being a filthy-rich real estate tycoon and star of "The Apprentice," his reality TV show.
Then, with Obama's poll numbers tanking -- even Charles Manson says he's an "idiot" -- The Donald started yakking about running for president. The talking heads pooh-poohed it as crass self-promotion, but now the 64-year-old zillionaire is beginning to look like a candidate.
He flits here and there doing nonstop interviews, assuring everyone he is the Democrats' worst nightmare, and GOP leaders fret that he may be theirs, too, a wild card with big hair destined to screw up the works in 2012. And why not? The Republican presidential field has all the pizzaz of a glass of warm milk. Trump promises Americans something different -- energy, sizzle and fireworks.
While Trump's politics remain unclear, he has latched onto an issue that separates him from other candidates and brings priceless attention and momentum -- the so-called "birther" question.
Trump, like many Americans, questions whether Obama was born in this country and constitutionally is qualified to be president -- or whether he was born in Kenya.
Supporters say Obama's Hawaiian birth certificate shows he was born in Honolulu on Aug. 4, 1961. There are even newspaper birth announcements. But doubters say questions remain; that there is a conspiracy; that Obama produced a worthless document. On and on, it goes.
The GOP candidates jockeying for the 2012 pole position are treating the birther issue gingerly, but must spend valuable time discussing The Donald's attacks -- whether they want to or not. Among them, Sarah Palin, a Trump defender who says he is treated unfairly by the press. She has her own coterie of birthers in Alaska -- mostly leftist, nut-job bloggers -- who wonder about her latest child.
It is difficult to imagine Obama with even a tiny secret. He did, you will recall, tangle with Hillary Clinton in the last election. With her money, contacts and venom she must know everything. Who believes she would keep quiet? But we are a nation of conspiracy buffs. Some believe the moon landings were staged; others, that Obama is a Kenyan commie.
Bush adviser Karl Rove and powerful Republicans cringe at Trump's attacks, believing they are poison for their party next year. The GOP wants the birther issue to evaporate. Arizona Republican Gov. Jan Brewer even vetoed a measure requiring presidential candidates in her state to produce birth certificates. But the questions have won Trump so much attention that other GOP hopefuls might as well be "Who? No. 1" through "Who? Ad infinitum." The attacks may be poison for the GOP, but they are honey for Trump. Where would he be without them?
Public Policy Polling last week asked Iowa Republicans about their presidential choices. Trump was third among GOP hopefuls. A Pew Research poll showed him leading in public perception.
"I think I am presidential," Trump told NBC Today.
Others must think so, too. He already is being lampooned in "Doonesbury." The Wall Street Journal has run a piece headlined, "Trump candidacy for White House gaining ground." He is a fixture on TV news shows. When he wants to seize Libya's oil, it is news. When he wants to tax China's imports at 25 percent, it sets off howls. The small-government Club for Growth moans he is no conservative. The liberal Center for American Progress does not like him, either. A promised bombshell book about the Obama birther issue is about to be published. The buzz only gets louder.
While Trump hammers at the questions about Obama, how The Donald will fare when Americans finally figure him out may be problematic. He drags along enough baggage to sink an ocean liner -- and Democrats see his birther rants as campaign gold to stir up their base.
As for his skyrocketing appeal? Robert Haus, an Iowa GOP operative hit it on the head when he told the Wall Street Journal:
"There's just something about him that is intriguing people, and I think it's that he's saying things that other people just think."
You have to wonder what that says about Trump -- and us.
Paul Jenkins is editor of the AnchorageDaily Planet.com.
PAUL JENKINS
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