As you've probably guessed after over a year of this silly column, I write about Alaska reality television. Generally, I don't venture out of the safe, comfortable confines of the Discovery Channel, Animal Planet, National Geographic and the other cable channels that manage to fill hours of programming with so-called Alaskana.
But occasionally I take a moment to talk about other zeitgeisty television topics. And since it's really cold, still pretty dark outside and a reader asked for it, I want give you some non-Alaska TV suggestions to get you through the remainder of winter.
I love television. And while I respect all the shows that ushered us through our latest golden age ("The Wire," "The Sopranos," "Breaking Bad," "Mad Men" and anything else featuring a male antihero), the hour-long drama has never really been my jam. I'm more of a 30-minute comedy sort of gal. So up your Internet data cap, borrow a friend's HBO Go password, get an Amazon Prime account (hello, free shipping) and binge-watch away. Note: If you have children, do not let them watch any of these. These programs are for adults only.
1. "Togetherness": This is a new HBO comedy about four adults in their 30s living in Los Angeles. It's warm, well-acted and so funny that I frequently laugh out loud.
2. "The Bachelor": I made a big stink about how I was out on "The Bachelor" and how it's formulaic and boring and every season is the same. I take that all back. It's so stupid and so excellent, and every Monday night you can find me at the Alaska Club for two hours walking on a treadmill glued to the shenanigans of a farmer from Iowa trying to meet a wife while dating 20 women at the same time.
3. "Veep" is my favorite comedy on television. It captures the realities and absurdities of politics so much better than a show like "House of Cards" or "The West Wing."
4. "Parenthood": The series finale is Thursday, and it's a delightful dramedy about a large family in Berkeley, California. If you loved "Friday Night Lights" (minus the second season) as much as I did, you will enjoy "Parenthood."
5. "Transparent" is an Amazon series about a father who opens up to her adult children about identifying as a woman. Jeffery Tambor of "Arrested Development" fame plays the woman and is so great.
OK, now back to Alaska. It's contest number five for "Ultimate Survival Alaska," and guess what? There is only one team without a win under its belts: the Military Team. And they won. What a convenient plot development.
There were some crazy moments in this episode. First, Grady Powell on the Military Team cut his foot on a rock as the team was trying to swim across a river near Spencer Lake. After trying to bandage it up, it kept bleeding and causing him problems, so he stitched up his own foot. That's some hardcore, Jack-from-"Lost" stuff.
Second, Tyler Johnson on the Alaska Team was still wearing a blue sleeping pad tied to his foot as a shoe. About halfway through their adventure, they ran into the Lower 48 team and Cluck, now the guy in the American flag bandana instead of the scarecrow hat, gave him a shoe. Cluck is the nicest.
I've realized that Marty Raney shouldn't be allowed near boats. Ever. Put that man on water and disaster ensues; this week he popped his packraft on an iceberg.
Finally, there's a guy named Ben on this show. I think he's been on the show all along, but who knows because he's on Dallas Seavey's team, and he's not Dallas. Therefore he gets no screen time.
I have to mention this because I took the time to watch "Alaskan Bush People. They are plugging an online personality quiz on Discovery.com/tv-shows/Alaskan-bush-people to figure out which Brown sibling you are. Weird. Weirder: It's been liked 1,800 times on Facebook. Weirdest: I actually took it. I am most like Gabe.
Alaska Dispatch Publishing