At first, off in the distance, it sounded for all the world as if the portals of Hades had cracked open and fiery souls were scrambling to daylight, splashing across the Styx, screaming in pain, howling, rending the cosmos with otherworldly shrieks and groans.
But no, it was just Democratic Alaska legislators facing the grim reality that their extortion racket just might be cashing out.
Here was one of them in the newspaper talking about getting a mediator or the governor -- or somebody, please God, anybody -- involved in budget negotiations because the nasty ol' House Republicans were not playing nice and rolling over as they should. There was another one on the TV news wringing his hands, wondering why the Republican-led majority would rather risk the Alaska Permanent Fund dividend -- risk it, do you hear? -- rather than negotiate a budget with Democrats in good faith. (I nearly choked on my Wheaties.)
What triggered the latest bout of angst was the Republicans' bold plan to circumvent Democrat efforts to hijack $100 million in spending -- a little of this, then a little of that, please -- dribbling even more red ink onto the state's long list of fiscal woes.
Alaska's budget is nearly $4 billion in the hole thanks in part to plunging crude prices brought on by a global oil glut caused in large part by Saudi determination to hold production levels high in a bid to crush the U.S. fracking industry, which has changed the oil map and cost that kingdom world market share.
To make ends meet, Alaska's Republican-led Legislature needed to tap the $10 billion Constitutional Budget Reserve to the tune of about $3.5 billion. To do that, the Alaska Constitution requires a three-quarters vote, but the Senate had trimmed an additional $100 million from the House budget, and the Democrats offered to trade their votes to access the CBR for putting back the spending.
The bitter fight has gone on for weeks, pushing the state to the brink of a shutdown.
At mid-week, the Republican-led House majority offered Democrats the education and cost-of-living raises for state workers they wanted, although it likely would cost layoffs. There is, after all, only so much money. And so it goes.
House Speaker Mike Chenault, R-Nikiski, proposed a way to circumvent the Democrats' recalcitrance, if a balky Gov. Bill Walker goes along. It would transfer about $5 billion from the Permanent Fund earnings account, which can be spent with a majority vote, to the fund's corpus, which cannot. The transfer would make those funds unavailable for spending and boost the $54.6 billion fund to nearly $60 billion.
The move would leave the Legislature with no pot of money to tap other than the CBR, and that reduces the constitutional mandate of a three-quarters majority to a simple majority in each chamber to pay the bills.
It seems such a long, arduous road to do the right thing, to recognize there is only so much money. Surely, there must be a better way to reach budget accord. "Gimme mine or else," is no answer. A looming government shutdown and its ensuing economic devastation, or a hefty sales tax or a pernicious income tax that could devour dividend checks for working Alaskans should have us thinking outside the box. (When the state in 1975 switched to a graduated state income tax rate independent of federal income tax rates, it was progressive, ranging from 3 percent to 14.5 percent. That would be one heck of a hefty pay cut.)
Rather than an annual free-for-all over access to the CBR, which will be drained in a few years, anyway, while praying for higher prices, or taxing ourselves into oblivion, perhaps now would be a good time to do what should have been done years ago, in the mid-1980s, when oil prices crashed through the floor and we did not have wads of dough socked away -- set up a predictable, manageable way to fund government.
It is beyond time to again start talking about a Percent of Market Value program in which the Permanent Fund is used as an annuity where all state income goes in and a set percentage is withdrawn annually to help fund government and pay dividends. It would protect the fund and the dividends and Alaskans' sanity. The fund trustees even endorsed the POMV idea.
It would require courage and a constitutional amendment. It can be done. It should be done, or in the future all that howling and screaming might just be us.
Paul Jenkins is editor of the AnchorageDailyPlanet.com, a division of Porcaro Communications.
The views expressed here are the writer's own and are not necessarily endorsed by Alaska Dispatch News, which welcomes a broad range of viewpoints. To submit a piece for consideration, email commentary(at)alaskadispatch.com.