Alaska News

Burke's Law: Stumped by kids' homework? Relax. You've got this.

In my mom role, I oversee a mostly enthusiastic group of five students ranging in age from 9 to 20 years old (not including the toddler). Hands down, the homework that routinely gives me the most grief is the stuff that comes home with the elementary school children. In these matters, I admit I am not smarter than a fifth-grader -- thank you very much, Jeff Foxworthy.

Our fourth grader is learning algebra in ways I'm certain I did not when I was her age. And both she and the fifth grader have in the last year come home with language arts homework that I suspect could be found in some college curricula.

The homework-generation gap is real.

Turns out, though, it's okay for us adults to not "get" some -- or even a lot -- of the assignments. We can't stay completely in the dark. But we also don't need to be Nobel Prize winners. A grander plan is afoot. More on that later. First, let's get back to the bit about being a bewildered parent-tutor.

Last February, desperate for clarity, I asked two colleagues for help. My email to them, titled "For the Smartest People I know," read:

"What the hell is the difference between a 'voiced' and a 'voiceless' consonant digraph 'th'? I am trying to help a nine- and ten-year old with 3rd and 4th grade language homework and it routinely MAKES NO SENSE. - #dinosaurtutor"

Smartest-colleague-I-know No. 1 admitted she had to consult Google for most of it. Smartest-colleague-I-know No. 2 offered an explanation which concluded with "In linguistics they're called 'dental fricatives.' "

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Dental fricatives! Are these teachers kidding me? Some nights I contemplated whether we were being punk'd by some very creative educators out to quash the last shred of my self-esteem. I know that's crazy thinking. I also know teachers want to work with us as a team on the side of success for these developing minds. So it wasn't too difficult to nix the conspiracy theory and seek a reasonable explanation elsewhere. To be fair, the elementary school kids weren't being taught the phrase "dental fricatives." But they were being taught to think about language and how and why it's voiced. A different approach than I recall being immersed in at their age.

More than once, Google has offered me enlightenment. Enter a few keywords from the assignment along with the child's grade level and you're bound to bring up a similar homework assignment with context and instructions. Hallelujah!

But, spoiler alert: Google alone is not a good solution. After many conversations with teachers, I've learned Googling can be a good tool, but it's not the only way to translate a kid's assignment from parent-speak into lingo and methods your student can comprehend. And a cyber scavenger hunt may not even be the best thing for a parent to spend time on.

So, parents -- especially us type A's -- it's time to implement a little homework-helper zen. Repeat after me: Perfection is not the path to success.

Here's where that "grander plan" I mentioned earlier comes in.

We don't need to be able to do the homework ourselves to be good at-home academic coaches. We don't even need to be subject matter experts.

The key, according to the Anchorage School District's resident math geek and executive director of curriculum and instruction, Bobbi Jo Erb, is to encourage the student to work through the problem-solving process themselves.

"Shift from assuming you have to know exactly what your child is learning in the exact way the child is learning it. Instead, help them get over their stumbling blocks themselves," Erb said in a recent phone interview.

Contemporary education emphasizes concepts in addition to memorization, Erb said. It's critical for young learners to be able to "understand how the concepts relate to one another and then apply them in a relevant way."

"We are living in an increasingly sophisticated world. It used to be only the elite needed math and science, but now we are all using math and science on a daily basis," Erb said.

Learning to be a problem solver is huge for a child and will remain useful throughout their lifetime. To foster this skill, ask your child questions that will help them solve homework problems themselves.

Erb recommends:

• With homework problems, let the student be the guide. Start with where the child is in the solving process and go from there. Don't wipe the slate clean and try to start over. The student's struggle to grasp the assignment is part of the learning process. Let their mind lead the way, not yours.

• Help your child know that they can go to their teacher for help. Role-play questions with your child to prepare them to rise to the task. Try phrases like "I'm confused. Can you help?" or "When is a good time to see you for extra help?" Modeling these small but important conversations at home will go a long way at school.

• At home, prompt your student through a homework problem. Ask, "Do you have notes about this somewhere?" Or "What did your teacher say about this?" Or "Talk through it. What do you think would be next?"

• Talk to and maintain open communication with your child's teacher.

• For math, consult ASD's GoMath tutoring site and other tutoring resources in the community. And this month, attend ASD's K-6 parent math night on Nov. 17.

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Christine Phillips and Wendy Hawn, fourth-grade teachers at Taku Elementary School, are more receptive to the "Google it" approach (cautioning, of course, that you have to screen out any age-inappropriate material that might come up; and be assured, it will occasionally pop up).

Still, there are good resources to be found via Google, including video tutorials, that can help both students and parents get a grasp of what's going on in a given assignment. Phillips and Hawn both said they occasionally use Google to get a handle on upcoming lesson plans.

"Sometimes those mini lessons you pull up might help the kid remember," Phillips said.

It's easy to forget, Phillips and Hawn add, that many students are performing beyond their parents' own education level. Having a resource adults and kids can both turn to for help can be invaluable.

Taking family schedules and the need for flexibility into consideration is also important. Single parents, parents that work nights, students who have extra-curricular activities and other family dynamics all affect how realistic it is for a child to be tackling homework nightly, Phillips and Hawn said. Not to mention that families need their own "down time" to talk with and enjoy each other.

If such obstacles exist, educators say the best thing a parent can do is reach out. Call the school or send an email directly to the teacher. That way, teachers and parents can craft a workable plan that allows the student to learn while at the same time accommodating the family's needs.

I often tell my own kids, "Education is the one thing no one can ever take away from you," something I probably picked up from my own family. It took years to sink in, but I get it now.

The bottom line when it comes to homework that confuses kids and parents alike? Make the effort. Nothing replaces the message a child learns when they experience that their family values education. Every teacher I spoke with emphasized this more than once. It can be as simple as routinely looking over the completed assignments your child brings home, or reading out loud with each other.

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"The more involved the parent is with the child the bigger impact overall there is," Hawn said. "Nothing is more frustrating as a child than trying to do something you need help with and you don't have the support you need at the time."

Jill Burke is a longtime Alaska journalist writing from the center of a busy family life. Her father swore by "Burke's Law No. 1 -- never take no for an answer." Meaning, don't give up in the face of adversity. The lesson stuck. Share your ideas with her at jill@alaskadispatch.com, on Facebook or on Twitter.

The views expressed here are the writers' own and are not necessarily endorsed by Alaska Dispatch News, which welcomes a broad range of viewpoints.

Jill Burke

Jill Burke is a former writer and columnist for Alaska Dispatch News.

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