THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU.
Ear is humbled and grateful. The voters of Alaska have once again put the needs of the Divine Appendage before the health of the republic and re-elected the Yukon Duke. The Omniscient Orifice can only say thank you.
As a token of Ear's gratitude, here are a few Golden Oldies from "The Wit & Wisdom of Don Young," who is still, thank goodness, Congressman for All Alaskans Who Voted for Him:
From the early oeuvre: "Pribilof's dogs," "bladderdash," "myramid," "negatism."
In 1986, reported he "travassed" the state during campaign.
In 1987 address to AFN, Don hoped a pending bill would "come to frutation."
Fairbanks 1985, explaining why national parks should be open to hunting: "You don't hunt rabbits on a pool table just because it's green." This one was refined at a 1991 House subcommittee hearing on drilling in ANWR. To an anti-drilling witness who said there were 1,100 miles of coastline available for drilling in the National Petroleum Reserve: "But there isn't any oil there. . . . Just because a pool table's green doesn't mean you're going to have rabbits on it."
In 1992, explaining why we don't need alternative fuels: "There is more fossil fuel available in the world, not more, but as much as was available, like gold, than there was when it was first found by Sir Francis Drake." (Apparent reference to Edwin Drake, credited with drilling the first U.S. oil well in 1859 in Pennsylvania).
From a 1994 Fairbanks campaign ad: "Don Young, Protecting our right to buy, carry and use fore arms."
In 1994, arguing that more police won't do much good unless there are more prisons: "That's like putting toothpaste back in the tube before it comes out."
In 1995, explaining he voted for the original Endangered Species Act because he thought it was aimed at saving animals "like leopards and lions . . . We never in my wildest imagination were thinking about rats, cockroaches, blue lupine, snail darters and spotted owls. . . . Nothing can convince me we can't breed spotted owls until we have more of them than we know what to do with."
Yes, d'Ears. There's only one Don Young, and he's still ours.
MEANWHILE, IN THE REST OF THE WORLD . . .
VERDICT'S IN . . . So darlings, turns out Juror No. 9 was basically pro-Ted. And the crazy juror who said her father died when really she just wanted to go to a horse race in California didn't act all that crazy during the trial and maybe she was faking it during the come-to-Jesus hearing with the judge.
That's the skinny on a blog allegedly written by Juror No. 11, the alternate who was called in when Marian Hinnant failed to show up. It's coy and sketchy, and only marginally informative so far. But Ear has hopes. The Legal Times blog identified the juror as Colleen Walsh, a program assistant at the City Christian Church. She told Legal Times that when the panel re-started negotiations after her arrival, one of the jurors presented a written list of rules: "No swearing, let each person have their say, and keep your voice down."
Juror No. 9 had trouble with the concept of Ted being found guilty of the "scheme" count since he didn't want the gifts in the first place. She also didn't want him sent to prison, according to Legal Times. According to No. 11, another juror explained: "If you get a sweater for Christmas that you don't like, and you don't return it, you still got a gift even if you hate the sweater."
There's more. Check it out at http://juror11.blogspot.com/.
ROBO VEEP . . . Begich campaign manager Heather Rauch answered her phone to be greeted with, "Hello, this is Sen. Joe Biden" . . . Oh, well, another one of those robotic calls that rained down on voters in the final days of the campaign. (Ear got one from Bill Clinton.)
Anyhow, it no doubt seemed churlish to hang up. So she waited for the message. And waited. Only there wasn't one. Turns out it was really Biden, looking for Mayor Mark to wish him well.
VERBATIM . . . Newsweek is promoting a big insider story about the Obama and McCain campaigns, running in its next issue. The magazine had a deal with both campaigns to let reporters behind the scenes for a year, as long as nothing got published until after the election. A lot of the trash being talked about Sarah is coming from leaks about the story. But here's a verbatim Ear liked:
"McCain loved the whole Palin family. They seemed to offer some relief, if not a touch of anarchy, to the Straight Talk Express, which had become a bit joyless. Piper, the governor's 7-year-old, thought nothing of crawling across Joe Lieberman's lap to get to her mother. Lindsey Graham mischievously enjoyed getting the child hopped up on Mountain Dew, a beverage to which (Graham) was mildly addicted. McCain relished talking to his running mate about guns and hunting in the wild. Duprey made up a T-shirt that read OUR CANDIDATE FOR VP CAN HUNT, SHOOT, DRESS, COOK HER DINNER. JOE BIDEN ORDERS TAKE-OUT. Palin put on the shirt and gave him a hug. "I love this shirt," she said."
OUT AND ABOUT . . . Rep. Les Gara, spotted Thursday morning, holding cheerful court at a corner table at Snow City, chatting with Walt Monegan.
A QUESTION . . . Is the Senate going to let Linda Menard, who takes Lyda Green's R-Wasilla seat in January, into the leadership coalition? Rumor is her close ties to Sarah have slimed her. All those senators, R's and D's, who helped the governor move her legislative agenda last session didn't appreciate how she bad-mouthed them on the campaign trail. More puzzling is the absence of Lesil McGuire, who is a centrist and was a coalition member last session.
Of course the real question is, will this coalition survive with only three Republicans?
HAIL MARY? . . . So, did Don Young get Sarah's OK to run that huge ad the day before the election, showing them together, clearly implying that she endorsed him? Ear knows nothing but couldn't help noticing that it was a really old photo.
DO SEND A FONDU . . . To Elliott Bundy and Kristin Pugh, who were married last Saturday in Santa Fe, N.M. They're both from Anchorage but met in Washington and starting dating when they both ended up working here in Lisa Murkowski's campaign office. Elliott works for a big PR firm in D.C. Kristin directs public affairs for President Bush's AIDS relief program.
SHAMELESS SELF PROMOTION . . . Here's a snippet from Atlantic magazine columnist Andrew Sullivan, a Republican, on his blog:
"If you want to know why newspapers are dying . . . They're just not as good as the web at its best. This election proved that beyond any doubt. For the record, I think the (Wall Street Journal) and the (Washington Post) and the (New York Times) and the Anchorage Daily News rocked in this election. Most of the rest of the old media: not so much."
FLYING FACTOID . . . Anchorage Animal Control has four doves for adoption named Trig, Bristol, Track and Piper.
No, Ear has no idea what it means.
Compiled by Sheila Toomey. E-mail ear@adn.com. Find Ear online at adn.com/ear.
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