Anchorage Daily News

TIME ON HIS HANDS ... Well, darlings, it's done. The corrupter gets three years in a federal summer camp. And a fine he probably had in his wallet during his sentencing in federal court Wednesday. Ear agrees Bill Allen is less culpable than those guys we elected, the ones who promised to be honest and represent us, then sold us out. Still, Ear finds Allen annoying -- all that conspicuous consumption and hobnobbing with C List celebs. Being a felon isn't what it used to be.

There were numerous Allen family sightings around town in the days before the sentencing. One earwig spotted Mark, owner of this year's Kentucky Derby winner, at the Pantry restaurant in the lobby of the Captain Cook with his "get-out-of-jail-free card" -- Daddy Bill. Another caught the whole gang, including Mark in his black cowboy hat, at a big-table dinner Saturday night at the Corsair.

A bunch of Allen family and friends were in the courtroom Wednesday, but, unlike most such events, the FBI agents who put the corruption case together were noticeably absent. Guess they were busy.

Among the "media" present was blogger Dennis Zaki, who likes to cut through the high grass. As one reporter tells it, Allen's bodyguard had to save Zaki from Mark after Zaki -- video camera in position -- asked questions like, "How does it feel to know your father corrupted Alaska?" and "How does it feel to be the guy who wanted to kill Dave Anderson (his cousin)?" Or words to that effect. Over the top? Check out the video at www.alaskareport.com.

Ear loves political theater, but when the sentencing was over, the big questions remained unanswered: What about Ben? What about Don?

PSSSST ... Want a super deal on Sarah's book, the one that hasn't even been released yet? A local activist got an offer in the mail recently from Newsmax magazine: $4.97, compared to the list price of $28.99. And you get a free introductory subscription to the magazine with it. And who was the activist who got this special offer? Andree McLeod.

Doncha just love it?

'TIS THE SEASON ... The Omniscient Orifice suspects several hundred people had to consult Google Maps to find the Crowne Plaza Hotel, the location of Gov. Parnell's kickoff fundraiser Tuesday. (Do you know where it is?)

Ear wonders how guests who dropped $500 to get in felt about the no-host bar, but there was plenty of finger food and the crowd seemed to be in a good mood. Seen munching and crunching: Providence CEO Al Parish, former Gov. Bill Sheffield, Palinista photog Judy Patrick, former School Board member Macon Roberts, Rep. Craig Johnson and a gaggle of the usual lobbyists. Oddly, no commissioners were spotted. Maybe earwigs just missed them.

BTW, it's located at C Street and International Airport Road.

A QUESTION ... What Channel 2 reporter started an interview with Sen. Lisa Murkowski this past week by asking her to pronounce and spell her name, and give her title?

Hey, it's the first rule they teach in TV Reporting 101.

The senator looked startled, but complied, then obviously had trouble keeping from laughing, as did the people around her.

THE OTHER ELECTION ... Liz Vazquez has filed for Matt Claman's Assembly seat in the municipal election. Word is Dan Coffey thinks she should pull out, that he has someone else in mind for the job.

ON THE MOVE ... Or not. The rumors about Tony Knowles getting a big job in the Obama administration have bubbled up again. This time it's the Commerce Department. We'll see.

BLAH BLAH BLAH ... By now we've all seen "Entertainment Tonight" spinning out that Levi Johnston interview where he says he's got something on Sarah. And we've seen how Palin's designated hitter, Magnum Staplegun, countered with an attack on Levi's skin poses for Playgirl magazine, which his handlers have said he's doing to make money for school and child support.

An earwig with way more time for research than the Divine Appendage forwarded these quotes from the Palin hagiography (look it up):

From Sarah's 2008 interview in Vogue magazine, about the swimsuit part of a beauty pageant: "They made us line up in bathing suits and turn our backs so the male judges could look at our butts ... I just couldn't believe it."

From "Sarah" by Kaylene Johnson, quoting brother Chuck about the Miss Wasilla contest: "I remember asking Sarah why she would enter a beauty pageant when that seemed so prissy to the rest of us ... She told me matter of factly, 'It's going to help pay my way through college.' "

Darlings, is Ear the only appendage that just doesn't care about any of this?

A FINAL QUESTION ... What the heck is Pie Spy anyhow? On her final disclosure forms, Sarah say she owns something named thusly, that it does "marketing."

FIX ... BTW, the correct address for the popular Mudflats blog is www.themudflats.net.

Compiled by Sheila Toomey. Find Ear online at adn.com/ear. Contact Ear at ear@adn.com or 257-4341.

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