Book an outdoors date with a loved one

Every year toward the end of summer, my husband and I face the strange, weightless feeling of freedom. It's bittersweet. My stepdaughter, 14, spends summers with us. When she leaves, we're unmoored. After spending a couple of months as a family, doing activities the three of us enjoy together, she's suddenly not part of the equation. It's an abrupt adjustment.

Then again, my husband and I suddenly find ourselves completely in charge of our weekends. We can do whatever we want.

This is both exciting and disorienting. It takes a few days to remember what it's like to have the time and space to just be the two of us. I'm sure for couples who have been together longer and raised several kids, the feeling is magnified tenfold. That ballast of another, smaller human with her own needs disappears. It's just us.

Luckily, my husband and I have a vast outdoors playground. For us, getting outside together helps us both mourn and mark the loss of summer while exploring something new. We get to know each other again after a season of family activity and schlepping. Going on an outdoors date is like hitting pause on life and taking a deep breath.

The traditional date of entering a dark room and eating popcorn while staring forward in unison at a screen for a couple of hours is an institution on its own, and it has its place in a dater's toolkit. But if this "outdoors date" idea sounds interesting to other Alaskans, here are some ideas based on our experience.

Kincaid picnic

There have been times when we only have a couple of hours to ourselves. In the middle of summer, while my stepdaughter was with a friend for an evening, my husband and I took our three hours and jetted first to the supermarket to pick up snacks and wine. Then we drove to Kincaid Park.

We noted how long it took us to walk down to the beach so we could get back by the time we'd committed to. Then, sitting on a log down near Cook Inlet and looking out over the water and mountains, time stopped.

It was in reality maybe only 20 minutes. But there wasn't any music playing, and neither of us was gazing at our phone. The wind was blowing and we watched the turbines at Fire Island slowly move. We ate the crackers and cheese, drank the wine and took in the sunshine. We chatted about this and that.

It was a pause on the rest of life. It was a good, free 20 minutes that somehow felt like it offered us more quality than 20 minutes could. The memory of that time together lasts.

This time of year, of course, another ready-made way to go on a hot date outdoors is berry picking. Blueberries are just about ready in many places; same with raspberries. Picking a spot to go and hanging for a couple hours, reeking together of DEET, is a fun and quick activity.

Day tripping

Sometimes it seems ridiculous to realize how lucky we are to live in Alaska, routinely having outdoors experiences that are once-in-a-lifetime adventures for many people. In moments when I've realized this, I've been known to yell, incredulously, "We're on a date!" (My husband reminds me I have to chill, which is true.)

Friends swear by the canoe trip out to the Islander Restaurant at Big Lake in Wasilla. I've never done it, but being on the water for an hour followed by tasty food sounds like a winning combo.

Biking is another go-to, whether it's the urban pub crawl, a mountain bike traverse on one of the Kenai Peninsula's many popular trails or simply a day on the Tony Knowles Coastal Trail.

For me, biking is about freedom and the ability to get farther on a handy rolling contraption than I could on my own two feet while taking in the open air. Having this feeling while out there exploring with another person is a much more exciting and bonding experience than shoving popcorn in my mouth while watching a movie (maybe that part comes later on when we're exhausted).

The full weekend

This isn't rocket science. Spending the night(s) outside together is the winning full-weekend outdoors date. Whether backpacking or car camping, choosing the place to pitch the tent and then making dinner outside is basically being 5 years old and playing house, but with wine. During the days, you can do any number of things — hike, pick berries, bike or just sit around and eat things in the sun.

Novelty, the sense there is always more to discover out there, is what being outside is all about. When I get to share that experience, navigating and enjoying the big Alaska outdoors playground on a date, it's hard to avoid the feeling that my husband and I are in it together.

Alli Harvey lives in Palmer and plays throughout Southcentral.