Film and TV

Browns vow to get back to the Bush in new season trailer

After a nice little sabbatical, Reality Check is back to bring you all the latest on the happenings of Alaska's most reviled television genre.

But first and foremost, there is some big news: There was an Alaskan on this season of "The Bachelor." Just in case you aren't familiar with this fine program, it features dozens of women who are so fed up with dating in the real world (and also fed up with not being famous) that they go on network television to date one man at the same time.

According to Olivia's bio, she's from Anchorage, 25 years old and an "apparel sales representative." This likely means she works in retail, but they made it sound fancy. The most outrageous thing she's ever done is "trying out for my high school football team and becoming the kicker." Like every other woman who has ever appeared on "The Bachelor" or adjacent franchises, her favorite author is Nicholas Sparks, and she is afraid of "spiders and not being able to find love." Cute.

The first episode aired Monday, Jan. 2, but — if you didn't catch it before — I said "there WAS an Alaskan on this season" because she was kicked off on night 1. Sorry, Olivia. Better luck this summer on "Bachelor in Paradise."

Next up, this season of "Edge of Alaska" wrapped up before the holidays in pretty typical fashion. Jeremy bought more land to expand his never-ending livestock quarters, which included building a huge barn with unstripped logs. Neil flew a mess of tourists up to the old Mother Lode Mine for $400 each and no one died. There was a baby born, an old-timer came back to McCarthy and everyone ended the season seemingly happy.

Finally, the new season of "Alaskan Bush People" aired on Wednesday, Jan. 4. Let's break down the Discovery Channel sneak peek.

Per usual, it begins with a deep-voiced narrator explaining the very basic premise of the show: A strange family lives in the wilderness, kind of. "After 34 years in the wilderness of Alaska, Billy Brown and his family are committing to the Bush like never before," the narrator says.

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Billy Brown, the dad, says, "If you want to blow it up, raise your hand." I'm glad to see the popular vote is still a strong measure of political will in Browntown. Billy then blows up a large amount of dirt and says: "All the problems, everything we had to deal with last year, were all those things of the outside world … It's time to get back to things of the Bush." I'm slightly confused about what they've been doing for the last four seasons.

[Related: Discovery producer goes off-grid in search of Alaska's next reality TV show]

Then there are the typical shots we've come to know and expect from the "Alaskan Bush People":

Noah (son who looks like he's from the ol' Wild West) kissing a lady. So many bears I can't count them. Chickens, cows. Rain (youngest, normal-seeming daughter) shooting arrows like Katniss from "The Hunger Games." Bear (human son) running. Bear (human son) howling. Bear (human son) climbing trees. Matt (eldest son who just got out of rehab) being alone and looking troubled. The entire family pulling heavy things. Boat getting caught in bad weather, etc.

It may be a new year, but so far 2017 is looking a lot like 2016 when it comes to Alaska reality TV. But ICYMI, if you have a fresh idea for a show this could be your year. 

Emily Fehrenbacher lives in Anchorage, where she reviews Alaska reality TV. You can reach her at realitycheck@alaskadispatch.com or on Twitter @ETFBacher.

Emily Fehrenbacher

Emily Fehrenbacher lives in Anchorage and writes "Reality Check," a regular look at reality television set in Alaska.

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