I live in Uruguay. A friend who lives in Anchorage has kept me abreast of the adventures and misadventures of Betsy the cow. I’m so far away, but perhaps you would be so kind as to publish my letter to her for me:
Dear Betsy,
I too am a little frightened of civilization. I live in a tourist mecca. It’s wonderful to meet people from all over the world, but often I just need peace and quiet, and a feeling that I’m part of nature and nature is part of me. You’ve made the right choice.
What I’m getting around to is, I’d like to join you. I don’t mean follow you around and make you feel uncomfortable. And I don’t want to hang out with you. After all, anyone can see that you’re a cow!
But I would like to enjoy some of what surrounds you, the mountains and forest and meadows. I like the smell of pine, even make tea from pine needles! And even though I wouldn’t choose to eat it, there’s nothing like the sight and smell of dew-moistened wild grass before dawn. Oh, how I’d like to wake with mountains as a backdrop to the first moments of the day!
I wouldn’t build a fire near you. I wouldn’t eat meat — not for breakfast, lunch or dinner. Would you mind if I had eggs once in a while? There’s nothing I could bring you, I suppose. Or, is there? I could hunt up a like-minded bull to accompany you, I suppose. Any preferences, Guernsey, Brahma, Holstein? Or would you prefer a steer, or just another cow, so you could have someone who’d listen to you and understand?
If you wouldn’t mind, and reassured on knowing I’d stay only for a little while, and that I would never, never tell anyone where you are, I could be there this coming Monday. Don’t worry, I’m sure I can find you. (After all, we are kindred spirits!) Monday is only four days from now, I mean four sunrises, four times that the dew is on the grass of your meadows and you sleep. So, you’d have time to change your mind, in which case, I’d find some other part of the mountain to stay.
Look out for bears, they’re hungry!
— Douglas Chapman
Punta del Este, Maldonado, Uruguay
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