If you get any of your news from an internet feed, you’ve seen lots of gardening clickbait articles. If you haven’t, you will as their frequency increases this time of year. Their headlines drag the gardener into a maze of adverts and “click-heres” until the nugget of information promised is finally revealed. And it is almost always useless.
Since gardeners can’t help themselves, I am calling on my fellow garden writers, their editors and even publishers to stop. If you persist on clickbaiting us, at least stop with the “use X, Y or Z kitchen staple” to solve “A, B or C common garden problem.” Enough is enough. If something works, just tell us and tell us why.
Last week I started seeing articles urging me to go to the pantry and find cinnamon to rid my lawn of harmful fungi and bacteria. Really? First of all, it would take a castle-size pantry — and a whole lot of grinding — to cover an average-size lawn! More important, all gardeners, and surely all garden writers, now know the soil food web controls and fungi and bacteria are at its base. Leave them be.
Beware of these kinds of articles. Some, like spreading cinnamon on your lawn, don’t make sense, often lack specifics about the problem and never tell us why the so-called solution works. What good is that?
Just between writing a first draft and then this column, orange peels were added to the list of kitchen items sure to make you a better gardener. Add these to vinegar, olive oil and baking soda, just this month alone.
Baking soda is a real favorite for these clickbait articles. “Sprinkle it on the soil surface to make flowers that thrive on alkaline soil bloom.” Unfortunately, a sprinkle isn’t going to adjust your pH by any means. And it is the pH in the rhizosphere that counts, so the necessary chemical adjustments will take a while.
Oh, and despite the headline, I am calling it on the same baking soda sprinkle making your tomatoes sweeter tasting.
Baking soda does keep fungus from accumulating on your lilacs or other shrubs. The deal is, however, you have to use it prophylactically and continuously well before you see signs of fungus. You can’t really kill powdery mildews once you see white fuze on your shrubs’ leaves.
The suggestion to use your kitchen cornmeal on weeds is also popping up. This works — and it is gluten-free — but you have to click/read through the article before you learn cornmeal only prevents seeds from germinating. It won’t kill existing, growing weeds. Cornmeal actually feeds weeds that are growing!
Vinegar is often also the subject of these articles. It will kill weeds growing in driveway cracks, but you really need industrial strength to get to the roots of dandelions and even then the results are questionable.
Then there is mayonnaise to clean indoor plant leaves. First of all, ick. Secondly, it would clog stomata even when used in moderation! Third, don’t even think of using it on hairy leaves. No good can come from using mayo on your leaves. Water is good enough for Mother Nature.
The last hort-clicker I saw suggested applying diluted, with water, sourdough starter to plants. I love sourdough and I know why it could work! Yeast undergo rhizophagy, just as do bacteria, moving into plant root cells and starting a cascading series of plant beneficial reactions. Still, I would rather have waffles. I can use compost on my plants.
You get my point? Beware fellow gardeners. We are in a new age and capturing eyeballs is what it is all about. Nonetheless, my plea still stands: Desist garden writers and editors. Leave the kitchen staples for the cooks. We are gardeners. Give us good horticultural advice, with supporting science, not clickbait kitchen solutions.
Jeff’s Alaska Garden Calendar:
Alaska Botanical Garden: Again, so much is going on you that you need to check the website. Better yet, join and get the newsletter so you are not only in the know, but you will know early.
Grafting Workshop: Fruit growers, a grafting workshop will be held at Begich Middle School on Saturday, April 13. Admission is free, and the public are welcome from 1-2:30 p.m. There will be many varieties of apple scion wood from which to choose, and instruction is provided.
They are back: Better than the swallows arriving at Capistrano, geese return to the Anchorage Bowl. Summer isn’t too far off. Now we have to wait until those birch leaves get to squirrel-ear size.
Flowers to start from seed: Sweat peas (6), asters (8C), nicotiana (20L), cleome (10), Zinnia, dianthus (5) iceplant. Numbers equal days to germinate, C means grow cool, L means seeds need light.
Vegetables to start form seed: Lettuces, broccoli, cauliflower, kale, peppers, tomatoes
Herbs to start from seed: Summer savory, sorrel