I read with teary eyes of the events leading to the deaths of Sue Sue Norton and Jennifer Kirk. “They were victims of domestic violence. They died on the same property. No one was ever charged,” (ADN, Nov. 12). Now, words nearly fail me as I struggle to understand the circumstances: How is it that men — surely the perpetrators are male — residing in a rather isolated community of about 3,000 citizens could for months, or even years, heap humiliation, pain, abuse, strangulation, beating and ultimately death on twowomen without consequence?
I certainly would not give the police, district attorney or courts a pass for Sue Sue and Jennifer’s killings. Those institutions, and the individual members of them that failed the women, should be ashamed. But the description of events triggered my memory of a prophetic opinion piece by Elise Patkotak published in this newspaper more than 10 years ago, on March 19, 2013. Titled, “To end abuse, good men must break silence,” Elise called out the male pals, hunting partners, co-workers and neighbors of the abusive reprobates that beat and kill their female partners — and sometimes their children, even in utero.
Years back, when I was a youngster, one of my neighbors was a violent drunk who beat his spouse and children when he was able to catch them. More recently, I had the difficult and unpleasant experience of addressing domestic violence in a Bethel courtroom. After one such case, I asked my mom why no one, my own dad included, intervened in the abuse taking place just across the street from my childhood home — not even with a phone call to the police. Everyone in the neighborhood knew what went on when the fellow came home drunk. My mom, to her credit blushing with embarrassment, said, “Back then, it just wasn’t done.”
It’s well past time for that conversation, men. We are, and never should have been, “back then.” Sue Sue and Jennifer are your own mothers, daughters,sisters, in-laws and friends. You men in the community see the bruises, the swollen eyes, the handprints on the necks of women and children. You hear the cries and screams, the banging around in their houses. You know what caused them. And you know what to do. More importantly, you know what not to do — pat those men on the back, silently share a cup and act like they are good people.
I suggest the Daily News run Elise’s piece again; her eloquent plea that men stand up and show themselves to be good people appears not to have found its mark. Maybe this time it will.
— Chuck Ray
Anchorage
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